Posted on Thu Feb 20th, 2020 @ 3:34pm by Kodria Mizu & Baroness 2nd Class Schwein von Alcott & Commander Rita Paris & Lieutenant Commander Mnhei'sahe Dox & Lieutenant Commander Sonak & Ensign Briaar Gavarus & Ensign Fiona O'Dell
Edited on on Fri Feb 28th, 2020 @ 10:23pm
Location: USS Hera, Deck 8, Commander Paris & Mr. Sonak's quarters
He say I know you, you know me
One thing I can tell you is
You got to be free
Come together, right now
The toast had led to the drinking, and she had drank and drank and drank.
Trying to keep up with demigoddesses and goddesses, wedged between Schwein and Loki as they all chugged their flagons of ale.
Trying to keep up with the alcoholics. "C'mon Commander, do some shots with us! Watch, O'Dell'll pass out in like, five seconds, s'crazy!"
Trying to keep up with the morose Romulan, she delivered an inspirational speech based on a bicycle bell, that was more offputting in it's incoherent rambling than inspirational. Which in turn caused Dox to force some water on her, which arguably saved her life as she switched to water for the rest of the party, in whatever festive glass found it's way into her hand.
The sun came up. She had the reservations for a weekend, and that had only been Friday night.
A moment of consideration dawned on her as the dawn itself seemed to stretch out impossibly, giving the sky a chance to continue constructing magnificent vistas of atmospheric beauty, showcasing the winds and the clouds in their dance of eddies across the skin of the planet.
"I'm not sure I can survive another day of this. I could go take a spa day, but they'll keep partying... they're still partying... well, loitering in a bar, but, who am I to judge." Shrugging off the bar oupon which she had been leaning for support, Rita Paris drew herself erect, paused, grasped her drink, a bamboo tiki cup, and chugged the rest of her water. Opening her eyes and centering herself, she took one more look at that beautiful dawn.
Stay. Relax. Enjoy, it all said to her.
Pulling out a collapsible tablet, the original series Starfleet officer punched up a search for what she wanted, and she found it. Booking transportation to accommodate the rather beefy specimens, Rita was pleased with the options available from the modern tourism mecca of the galaxy. "The future is everything it was cracked up to be."
"All right, ladies," The awake and alert first officer roused the attention of the assemblage, the private party currently parked in the Caesar's box at the Palace. "The rule of the bachelor or bachelorette party is that it ends with breakfast. It is dawn, there is a diner in this town with seating that will accommodate our larger members, and I have called us a cab in the form of a topless double-decker charter to ourselves- here's to our Artan sugar momma. Now go pee before our ride gets here. Let's go, ladies, look lively now!"
It had only been 29 hours of wakefulness. Really it wasn't that much, but the drinking, the mixing of alcohols and the various intoxicants had made it a very exhausting 29 hours. She'd hit the detox hypo she'd brought with her once she was sober enough to remember she'd had it. Which left her awake for the rainbow bridge back to the Hera, but it was so much different from transporting, she realized. As the Bifrost connected two points like a stargate, there was none of the panic that ran through her cells at their deconstruction into energy. She just.... moved in space.
It was sublime and extraordinary. The nubile navigator understood what it did- what she didn't understand was how they did it. But traveling by Bifrost when she wasn't having an anxiety attack, gave her a moment to be logical in her analysis of the situation. This was something of considerable interest to her, and she offered her thanks at the end of the ride. "Thank you, Heimdall. That was... amazing."
Particularly become Risa, then home, still in the Aldebraan system 42.6 light years distant, likely still moving at warp speed and how do they do that?!?
Goodnights, hugs, goodbyes, and everyone shuffling out of the conference room tugging down their tunics and putting on their game faces to make it to their quarters. Everyone has the day off. All the shifts are covered, all is well, go to bed.Following her own advice, clearing the room, straightening up, marching out onto the bridge to head for the turbolift.
Catch the eye of Lieutenant Bacon in the command chair. Offer him a polite smile and a nod.
The Lieutenant, reading the sign after the parade that just left, acknowledges the nod with a slow one of his own. Offering a very abbreviated two fingered salute, the Commander is off to her quarters, and Lieutenant Bacon now has a bridge story to tell at parties.
"Deck 8, please."
=^= You look exhausted, Commander. Would you prefer to go to sickbay? =^=
"No... just my quarters, and bedrest. If I don't feel better when I wake up, I'll go to Sickbay, I promise you."
=^= As you say, Commander. Good night. =^=
"Good night, Hera."
Across the starship, the sentiment was returned.
The brisk walk down the hall of officer's row, which was, as it tended to be, deserted- as if by design.
The door, and into their quarters... home.
The black leather biker jacket went into a pile on the couch, which the exhausted executive sat on to get her boots off with a groan. Once she was dehooved, she stretched her calves out slowly, trying to coax the tendons back into place as he'd taught her. It was the middle of the morning, so he was in departmental meetings- the experimental botanical group in science lab 13, down on Deck 25.
Wrestling out of the dress, then out of the thong that she swore was trying to strangle her all night, Rita gathered her ensemble and tossed them in the clean closet, to be sorted when she woke up. A military speed efficient sonic shower later and she was crawling into bed. A moment to be logical in your analysis of the situation. Flopping down on her back, as she tended to sleep, she reached for him.
T'hy'la. He who was her husband. Her mate, the great constant of her life.
T'hy'la, came the deep, soft response into her mind.
"Sonak," she murmured as her arm curled around a pillow in the too large for her bed, her breathing evening, her muscles relaxing as he'd taught her.
I had an adventure... it was exhausting. I feel I ended things badly with us, and... I want us to be okay again. When you come home tonight, can we... talk? Ordinarily she worked to structure her thoughts to effectively communicate with him, speaking not of feelings, but of the practicalities of the situation; appealing to him logically. But exhausted as she was, she subconsciously relied on him to translate it this time, as it was all she would manage to telepathically murmur to him as she drifted off to sleep.
Always, was his reply, leaving behind it an eternity to fill up that promise.
Sonak returned to their quarters a short time later. When their bond became strong enough to actually become a telepathic contact, he knew it was more than just his former psionic powers slowly reawakening. It was because something very important for her was up in her mind, in her soul. And what was important to her was important to him; more so than any importance he might estimate for him alone.
He heard her even breathing as he entered, and smelled faint traces of alcohol, sweat, perfume and fabric intertwined. Deducing from those what she had been up to recently, he decided to let her have a much needed and earned rest. He noiselessly removed his uniform, donned his kolinarh tunic and sat in their living room to meditate.
in calling, she had referenced the last time they had a private discussion together; one where he miserably failed to correctly answer her needs, because he was simply unable to truly comprehend them on their basic emotional level. Understandably, he did not wish for this to reoccur again. And so, he meditated on the matter, finding rest and purpose at the same time.
He had not been there for her. This was inexcusable. He would make better effort.
As she slept, she was aware of him, on the most subconscious level. While her adventures had carried her far away from him more than once, she continued to derive great solace from his presence, as she could literally sense his proximity. With him, she felt sheltered, secured and beloved; these were concepts that were quite elusive to her until she had met him. With his support and reinforcement, she had grown considerably as a person, gaining confidence and self-worth, as she saw herself through his eyes, and saw herself as he saw her.
The day passed, and she slept soundly, recuperating from her girl’s night out, celebrating the pending marriage of the Baroness von Alcott. As she slowly stirred to wakefulness, the extradimensional explorer became consciously aware of her logical mate nearby. As he was meditating, it offered her calm as she rose, bringing a smile to her face that he was already here. Relieving herself, she washed her face and hands, pulled on a white cotton t-shirt that declared ‘Earth Girls Are Easy’ and some pale blue cotton panties, then padded barefoot out to the living room. She debated starting the kettle before disturbing his meditation, but that was pointless. He knew she was awake and moving about, of course. So instead she filled and started the kettle to make spiced tea for them, mixed the blend, then came to him in the living room, a cup in each hand as she leaned in to hug him somewhat awkwardly from behind.
“Good morning, he who is my husband,” Rita murmured as she hugged him, then released him to come around to seat herself before him, cross-legged. “Your presence pleases me as always, and it welcomes me home.”
Sonak let her hug him without moving a muscle, aware of just how important physical contact was to her. It certainly was not meaningless to him either, at least when it came from her.
''There is no home for me without you, nor presence more significant than yours,'' he answered, his eyes and mind all for her. ''Did you have a restful sleep, my wife?''
“That's sweet... yes, I did. I definitely needed that,” she admitted with a smile, setting his tea before him. “Thanks for letting me sleep. So…. before I left, I came to you for solace, and I don’t think I phrased my request well. When I didn’t get what I was seeking, I left angry, which isn’t at all constructive. It’s been a while since I came to you for that sort of thing, and…” Sighing, she lowered her eyes to study the tea mug in her hand as she spoke. “I guess I should have outgrown it by now, but sometimes I want to be reassured. Which is fine, if I am seeking a logical solution, but… I wasn’t. I was just intimidated and worried about the transport and I sought you out on vagaries instead of looking for a concrete answer. It was just all feelings and anxieties, and that isn’t really the thing to bring to you.”
''Your assessment is correct. You chose to link yourself to a Vulcan; and more to the point, one that is not controlling emotions but devoid of them. I am the born blind to all your colors. In this, I shall logically fail more often than not, as logic is not the end of everything. You teach me that wisdom every day we share."
He looked straight at her.
"I shall strive at least to be more perceptive in the future, to try and compensate for my failings and be a better husband to your needs, my wife.''
"It wasn't a failing.... I don't know," Rita set a course for a logical explanation of how she was feeling. "I used to be able to come to you, and... you made me feel like I could do anything. That hasn't really been how our interactions have felt for a while, which... also kind of adds a bit of insecurity on my part. I do know how you feel about me, of course, but... I do need to hear it from you, sometimes. I think you're amazing, and brilliant and clever and far away the most attractive man I've met in any reality. If I don't say it enough, I should."
"My point is... everybody looks to me. I have to be the example, the one with a plan, the Commander. Which is fine," Those bright blue eyes came up, and the human raised her hands a bit in protest. "I love the job, and the ship, and the crew, and all of it. It's just... a lot easier if you believe in me, if that makes any sense?"
''Feelings do not make sense; they are as they are and in themselves is their value,'' he retorted. ''I do not have to merely believe in you; I know you. I have ample, concrete evidence that you are a most competent officer, a most able commander, a credit to your hard work, and a prime example to follow. Truth be told, in my dealings with other crewmembers, and as inadequate as I am to do so, I myself follow your example as best as I can.''
He sat squarely in front of her.
''You know I do not need you to tell me how you feel about me. I may not understand, but I know. But if it is worthwhile for you to state how you feel, I will always be here to listen and appreciate your estimation of me or anything else. I accept it as part of your being, but a facet of the gem that you are to me. As with a laser, there is no coherent light for me without you.''
For a fleeting moment, he wondered if he had wandered accidentally into that nebulous, mysterious realm called poetry. Nevertheless, his words were the words of truth, so he pressed on.
''It is somewhat the same with the ship. You are the focal point between command and crew. It is only logical that you are conscious of the responsibility this entails. This is the burden of command. Which you bear at least as well as any other command officer ever does, or did, bar none. Never doubt that. I do not.''
Something then occurred to him.
''There is a truth that may not sound logical, but is a truth nevertheless: it is entirely possible to make virtually no error and yet still fail. Do not dwell on the risk of failure; concentrate on the possibility of success. With you, within you, it is always there.''
“Thanks Sonak,” she smiled in return. “Failure is seldom a worry, just… with gods and demigods and supersoldiers and bodybuilders, sometimes I just worry about measuring up when I am only human, you know? I'm not a genius, not a scientist or an engineer, a telepath or an empath or cybernetic. Nothing but a regular Earth gal who is still woefully behind the times. Plus transporters or similar technologies still cause anxiety, because for all the times I’ve done it just fine, the times it has not gone fine… “
Pausing at that, Rita made her choice as she always did, and committed to the truth. “I worry that one day I'll get so lost, that you won’t be able to find me. That I’ll lose you, this life we have here... everything. And I’ll have to start all over again. Without you. That… is something that worries me, every time something like transporting comes up, which I guess... I wish you could understand? I know, I know we always manage, but… I just… worry one day we might not. The idea of going on without you and rebuilding a life… I know I can, but I very much don’t want to.”
"When I come to you because I am worried about a transport, that's what's going through my mind, those fears," she explained, then paused, cocking her head and nodding as her eyes unfocused a bit. "Which... I suppose... relates to your advice. If I'm worried about it going wrong, that increases the likelihood that it WILL go wrong? So I should instead concentrate on the possibility of success, to sort of Nietzschean 'will to power' it to not go wrong?"
''Despite what some would like to believe, the universe never bends to our will,'' Sonak answered patiently. ''Your point of view is perfectly understandable from a being of emotion. The only thing I can offer you to... deal with it, are logic and reason. How well you might succeed in this balance, or in any other way of your choosing, is only up to you; that is where the will comes into play. I believe the Human expression is; you have to live with yourself and no one can, or should, live your life for you. But whatever you choose, remember this, my wife; in this, and all that is, you will never be alone.''
As he paused to make sure the sincerity of his words was felt before continuing, she reached out to stroke his jawline with her fingertips, a smile gracing her face. It was as close as she was going to get to a reassurance that no matter what, he would always find her. Because he would not make a false statement, or one that could not be empirically proven- such a statement, on it's face, would be illogical. But he understood her need, and he was offering what comfort he could, within the strictures of logic.
''The only standard you have to measure up to is your own. What you are is unique, across all of spacetime. Your life is as worthy and significant as anyone else's, as much as you will it to be. Each one of us can only act according to one's will and one's gifts. Expecting anything else is illogical. I, for one, only expect you to be true to yourself. In that, no one is more worthy of praise and admiration. I challenge all those so-called gods, demi-gods, supersoldiers and bodybuilders, geniuses, scientists, engineers, telepaths, empaths and cybernetics to make that claim.''
He looked again straight into her eyes.
''It is because you are yourself that you, and you alone, are, and could ever be, myT'hy'la. ''
Moving the tea mugs aside, she turned and lay on the floor, resting her head in his lap and pulling his arm over her as she interlaced her fingers with his own, feeling the closeness of their minds becoming that much more pronounced with physical contact. Expressing herself to him, she was honest and vulnerable, giving mental voice to her fears. So you haven't grown weary of me yet? My emotional needs are not tiresome to you, my insecurities do not trouble you?
He used his free hands to start a soft session of Vulcan massaging techniques to ease her body and mind.
I have no emotions; therefore I cannot be troubled. But they DO concern me, because they do trouble YOU, he answered through the incorruptible link of their minds, where only truth could exist. As for your emotions, they are an endless fountain of wonders for me to discover and ponder about; and as long as you have needs, I may justify my presence in your life, through what I may bring to you in our relationship... as little as it may be. That alone is enough to prevent any possibility of... weariness. Ever.
There's the sex, too, she said frankly. "Never discount the sex. It really helps keep me on an even keel." After she had spoken did she realize she had switched to audible communication. Wholly unnecessary at this point, since they overlapped as yin and yang, the ebb and flow of the tides and the shore. Yet he had always encouraged her to speak if she preferred, because often by vocalizing she framed her thoughts, even to herself. In this case, when she said the words, it led her to the realization that the entire episode had been illustrating to her, and her eyes snapped open.
Sitting up, she turned to face him, her face a mask of incredulity. "Yesterday... okay, technically day before, yes, but, point being, when I came to you and explained that I was all anxious about everything that came up... I wanted to have sex, but I didn't realize it. You started walking me through a logic exercise, because you were trying to respond to the call for help with a logical approach."
Having grasped the situation to this point by verbalizing it, she kept the train of thought rolling, nodding. "That's what I was subconsciously after, to bond physically and intimately with you before embarking on a dangerous journey. But I didn't consciously realize that was what I was after, so instead I picked a fight and stormed off." Smiling an off-kilter lopsided grin at him, she offered an apology. "That was both unproductive and illogical."
''Indeed. Sex is not only part of our marital duty, it is an integral component of our mutual well being and fulfillment; one that only you and I can provide for each of us fully and properly. By bonding together, we pledged to one another that we would fulfill this part of existence fully and totally to one another ,with the entirety of our body, mind and soul; to the exclusion of all others.''
It was obvious that no apology from her part was necessary as far as he was concerned; but he accepted it for the sake of her emotional need. And of course he was not smiling at all when he said then;
''In other words, as you Humans say; ask and you shall receive.''
The smile that spread across her face was a beautific one, as she appreciated him in that moment. It was often said that Vulcans had no sense of humor, nor did they joke. But she knew better, from time and experience with the most impressive man she'd ever met, who would remind her that he was no man, but a Vulcan. Closing the distance between them, her smile became playful, and she wiggled her eyebrows at him in an unspoken question.
Asked, she would receive.