Influences

Posted on Mon Apr 6th, 2020 @ 12:11pm by Commander Rita Paris & Jaeih Dox-t'Aan
Edited on on Fri Apr 10th, 2020 @ 4:01pm

Mission: Born and Reborn
Location: The Khallianen, The Hera
Timeline: 2397

Earlier that day...

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Staring at herself in the mirror of the small refresher aboard the Khallianen, Jaeih Dox felt her stomach tighten and her anxiety begin to ramp up. It was a tendency her notoriously anxious daughter did not get from nowhere, and at this exact moment, one overriding thought was beginning to get louder in the back of the mind of the former Tal’Shiar operative as she looked in that mirror at a woman that she wasn’t sure was really her:

Run.

She had just learned a truth that she had been actively avoiding thinking about for a long time now. Something she had suspected but put out of her mind for months. Something potentially terrible. That her mind and her decisions of late had been subject to the influence of another. An idea that the woman who had spent years subjecting her own people to mind control to ensure their loyalty to the Romulan Star Empire found abhorrent.

The woman accompanying them to her Daughter-In-Law’s homeworld of Miradon known as Hera, was defined as some sort of hyper-advanced being from a race worshiped as gods on Earth thousands of years ago. In this case, a Goddess of mothers and family. And this woman had some form of power. An ability, but her mere presence, to influence to lives and behavior of others, often without their knowledge. Women like Ethel Jablonski, who believed in this Hera’s benevolence and power benefited from her self-described aura by steadily increasing in strength and power. The woman had become a mountain of muscle in a fairly short period of time, growing even in height as she absorbed the effects of this so-called aura. When her own door on the Hera was still being guarded, Jaeih had watched Ethel grow taller over time. It was functionally impossible but it happened all the same.

And now, Jaeih had learned that this aura had been affecting her as well. Influencing her thoughts and behavior for months. SOFTENING her. Making her embrace her role as a mother and a guardian of children. Suddenly, the choices she had been making began to make more sense. Suddenly, the decision to walk away from the career path that had dominated her entire life… that of intelligence… had taken a back seat to becoming some kind of nanny to the children of the Hera. And not just any children, but the children most affected by this Hera woman.

No longer was she the warrior she had been. No longer the canny Romulan woman who prized her abilities at deduction and investigation above all else. No longer the woman who could control her most base emotions of sentimentality and childish affections.

She was a Kreldanni NANNY.

Her days spent, not uncovering secrets or controlling her own destiny. Instead, she now watched over a brood of mewling children. And in the cockpit of the ship, were three more coming that she would take to helping raise. Her own grandchildren. The daughters of her daughter and the Miradonian woman who had seemed to find her way into Jaeih’s heart at the same time that she found her passions shifting. Her resolve to be who she was... weakening. Was that her own thoughts, or the work of this Hera woman?

She didn’t know anymore. And the idea that her own thoughts might not be trustworthy frightened the stern Romulan woman to the bone. How badly had her mind been compromised? Was she even capable of knowing?

When she thought of Mona and the children to come, she wanted to smile. She cared deeply for the Miradonian woman. She had already sacrificed her own freedom once to protect her and those unborn children. Was that truly her decision or the lingering influence of Hera?

Minerva O’Dell had stolen her heart. She was now the Theirr’anov, or godmother, to Captain Telvan’s daughter, Moira. And here, on her daughter’s freighter, she found herself missing their presence. She missed caring for children? Was she not the same woman who trained her own daughter to fight by breaking her bones? Was she not the same woman who left the Mol Krun’chi colony where Mnhei’sahe was born simply to return to her career as a smuggler where she was free?

THAT was Jaeih Dox.

Or was it? Who was Jaeih Dox, anymore? As she stared into that mirror, her brow cold, and her pulse quicker than usual, she wasn’t sure. Even the NAME, she kept and didn’t know why. She had no love for Declan Dox. Their marriage a sham to help hide Mnhei’sahe from the machination of Verelan t’Rul. She was Jaeih t’Aan. That was the house name her father had earned through his noble service to the Imperium. Yes, when she betrayed that same empire, that name was written and burned three times on the floor of the Romulan senate. It held no further influence on her homeworld, and would never be spoken again by her people. But that was no reason to embrace the name of a man she cared nothing for simply because… it had value to Mnhei’sahe.

Why did she care so much about such things? Did she decide to on her own? How could she even know? The thoughts danced in her head in a violent display of aggression and self-doubt that she could not reconcile. And as she stared at her own face in the mirror, her eyes narrowed and her anger rose. She had been manipulated. Used. Turned into something other than who she had always been. She believed she was changing and growing as a woman, and it now turned out that she was. But perhaps… not by her own choice.

And she did not like that idea.

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Hours later, the moon of Miradon shone brightly through the expansively large room in the hotel room she had to herself. It was twice as large as her quarters on the Hera and, in that moment, felt painfully empty. The others had likely settled in for the evening in preparation for the tour of Mona's world that would begin in the morning, but the elder Romulan woman just couldn't sleep. Her fears from earlier, that she had tried to ignore, gnawed at the back of her mind.

After pacing around the room, the former Intel operative made a decision. She did not want to burden Mnhei'sahe or Mona with her concerns, and while Ethel was a good and honorable woman, she herself admitted she was incapable of being impartial concerning the woman known as Hera. In truth, there was one woman Jaeih trusted in spite of herself, to always tell her the unvarnished truth. And that was what she needed to calm her mind. So she stepped over to the communication stations and paused for a moment.

Jaeih wondered if she was going mad. Doubting herself and who she was. Doubting her own mind. And now, perhaps the most insane course of action she could have thought of. Entering her control codes into the hotels' comm system, Jaeih called up the control screen and spoke. “This is Jaeih Dox. Access Code 99C-X7363. Private message to… *sigh*... Commander Rita Paris.”

“...Please…”

=^= Commander Paris, you have a private call from Jaeih Dox =^=

There were five seconds where she did not trust herself to speak, for fear of what she would say aloud to the ship's computer. That moment passed, stretching out for what seemed like considerably longer in subjective time. But once she had regained her faculties, Rita Paris disengaged herself from the activity in which she had been engaged, and hopped out of bed, rolling her eyes to the overhead as she scampered into the reclamator.

"Please put the call through, computer, thank you." Rita paused while she tried to convince her bladder to purge. "This is Paris, go ahead, Mrs. Dox. Please tell me there's no trouble?"

Sitting on the bridge of the small craft, Rita's tone was curious as Jaeih cricked an eyebrow and replied. "No, nothing like that. We are safe and secure. There has been no trouble to speak of. It's, in fact, quite lovely here. It's..."

"I apologize for calling at such an hour, I do..." As she spoke, there was the slightest warble in her voice. An echo of the same insecurities Rita had become quite familiar with hearing from Jaeih's own daughter. "But... I have a... more... personal concern that I... cannot reconcile in my own."

"I..." The words felt like leaden weights upon her heart as she forced them out. "I... needed to speak with... with you."

Ankles on either side of the toilet, knees together, Paris quirked an eyebrow as she considered what was happening. At least it isn't 03;00. The woman had placed a subspace call, and no matter how 'private' you made an incoming call to a starship, it wasn't that private on an intel vessel. But on that channel she was having a crisis. NEEDED to speak to me? Hmmm. Grandma for real now, Mona's gonna pop any second and you put her in a Winnebago with Hera and Jablonski... they made small talk. The Aura thing. Doubt yourself, is this all a mind game, oy vey.

When she spoke,m her voice was low, and earnest. "Talk to me, Mrs. Dox. You have my full attention, and I'll help however I can. What's on your mind?"

"My mind. Perhaps that's as good a place to start." Jaeih said, half to herself as she seemed to be verbalizing her thoughts. "This woman... Hera. We spoke and... she spoke of some kind of... AURA. Some kind of... Projection from her that affected others. She... said that I have been... absorbing it rather strongly. You know something of this?"

"I do," Paris answered, then launched into a reasonable presentation of the facts. "The Hera entity continually emits wavelengths of energy that correspond with emotion. She manipulates neither the energy nor the emotion, but if it reverberates within an individual, it enables them to exceed known parameters. Petty Officer Jablonski is a notable specimen, as you likely have surmised by now."

"As you may imagine, any sort of energy display such as this, even a gradual one that builds up over time, is something of considerable interest to the science department. You know how thorough Mr. Sonak is, of course. The facts and figures of all active and passive scans have been cataloged. Sickbay has monitored the progress of all of the affected individuals, as well as those who have rejected the gifts offered. A number of the Security staff consider the aura affectation to be sinister, and want no part of it. They continue to appear to be untouched by the energy wavelengths that Hera radiates."

"Am I to assume that the reason why you are asking me this question is because you are, ah, wondering if you yourself have been affected by this 'aura'?"

"I... am not, as a point of fact. It has been stated, in no uncertain terms that I am, in essence, absorbing this... aura. And have been, it seems, since I arrived." Jaeih said, her voice sounding more unsure and anxious than Rita had likely ever heard it before. "The implication is that, like Petty Officer Jablonski, I am... exceedingly receptive to this aura. But in my case it is affecting not my strength or musculature, but my mind and emotions."

"Hera referred to it as an effect on my... maternal instincts and..." Jaeih paused as she considered her words. "Thoughts. My thoughts have been affected by this. And if I am to understand this properly from what this Hera, Miss Jablonski and yourself are saying, I have unknowingly... invited this."

"What... what does that mean?" Jaeih legitimately asked.

"It's my understanding that you can choose to accept or reject this aura, as it has been defined," Paris replied in earnest. "I am no stronger now than when I arrived, nor and I faster healthier... well, perhaps a bit mentally healthier but that has a lot to do with Sonak and less with Hera. You will note I am not pregnant, and while I may, as was observed often in my youth, 'built for making babies' I have not done so in the year and a half she has been aboard over time. So, my experiences notwithstanding..."

There was a pause then, as Paris sought what to say. In the end, searching her feelings, Rita, as always, did the best she could. "You wanted to be a better mother to your daughter, Mrs. Dox. You wanted to be a good grandparent. I suppose that in that desire, you may have opened yourself to Hera's aura, and yes, it may have affected you. Making you more patient, more... adept? at the art of parenting. Because that was what you wanted, and that's kind of Hera's bag. Plus she is very fond of a redemption story, of healed relationships between mothers and daughters."

"So yes, I suspect that you may very well have been affected," the starfaring siren of so long ago admitted. "Which is deeply unsettling to you because despite what I am sure were reassurances from all involved, you don't believe that you would allow yourself to be influenced thusly. Ergo you are now questioning whether your choices have been your own, or if they have been guided by that energy wavelength that makes midgets and space pig pub crawlers excellent parents. In short, you are concerned that your mind has been tampered with, and you are somehow going from being a dangerous woman to a motherly pushover. How'm I doing?"

There was a long pause as Jaeih deeply considered everything Rita had said. When it came down to it, the elder Romulan woman legitimately trusted Rita in a way she did few others. And at that moment, that trust was essential to her.

"You... are doing quite well, Commander." Jaeih admitted. "I... when we first met. When you came to me at Starfleet Intel Command and we talked, you... surprised me, Commander. You were very different from those I had been forced to endure in my time there. And while I would go on to cause further damage to Mnhei'sahe afterward, on that day that you came to me, I meant everything I said to you."

The elder Romulan took a large breath as she continued. "It is implied by all of this, that what has happened to me is exactly what you are saying, which corroborates what Hera and Miss Jablonski,  that this effect has simply... enhanced who I wished to become. Made that... easier for me in some respects."

"But... as you said... it has... damaged my ability to trust my own thoughts on the matter. And for what it is worth, Com... for what it is worth, RITA, I... trust you." It was possibly the first time the once-jaded Intel operative had ever referred to Rita by her first name, "I need to ask you, because you are a horrible liar: Am I the same woman I was... no... that I wanted to be... when you first met me? Before I was exposed to this... aura."

Sensing the urgency of the moment, Rita Paris took a deep breath, considered her words, then carried on.

"Mrs. Dox... Jaeih..." Rita Paris was something of a stickler for such things, and had also never used the woman's first name either. Both of them were a bit old-school that way, in their own ways, and thus she intentionally brought the intimacy of the conversation to the same level to which the elder Dox had brought it. "You are not the same woman, no. She was very, very angry, distrustful, and frankly archly superior. Surrounded by those who treated you as a codebreaking machine, essentially, with no interest in you as a person. A prisoner, no matter how gilded the cage, who resented her captors. Of whom I was one."

"You distrusted me, my motives, the news I brought- why would you not? And when I brought your daughter, you still distrusted- her, in this case, as you were trying to protect her from the truth, but protect yourself from it just as much. When we had you shipped out to the Hera, you distrusted it. You waited for the other shoe to drop, for the catch in it all. For it all to turn out to have been a mind game or a trick. Which, I admit, was all reasonable, given your background and your experiences." Shifting on her seat a bit, Paris focused on what she was saying, as this next bit was important.

"Over time, we earned your trust. Although I have to say, I have never had to prove myself so consistently to anyone since my own father as I have with you, Mrs. Dox," Rita chuckled, a bit ruefully. "Your daughter believed me the day we met, saw what she could be, and set her course, because we reached an understanding. She wanted to be a good Starfleet officer. I wanted for her to be a good Starfleet officer; and I would teach her, because senior officers train junior officers, and prepare them to take over for the next generation. That's Starfleet tradition, Mnhei'sahe saw that, and recognized it was what she wanted. She chose to trust me that day, and never questioned that."

"You are a very different case. A lifetime of suspicion and betrayals has left you suspicious of everything and everyone. And I am not condemning that," Paris qualified. "We need someone to be looking in the dark corners, to suspect the motives of others, to be on guard against betrayal. It is just a challenge of mine, that I must prove to you again and again that we come in peace. That your choices are your own. That we want to help, but we will not force you to act or do something other than what you yourself choose, within reason. With that said..."

"I believe Hera offers the tools. Patience. Protectiveness. A bit of wisdom, earned through years of mistakes. inborn knowledge that every woman knows in her heart, that sometimes gets tangled up on the way out. That warm feeling when you see a child smile. Hera offers to encourage these things..." Paris took a deep breath, as she had rambled a bit now, and needed to get to the point. "But yes. I genuinely believe- and so far, science bears me out- that you chose whether to let her help you become a better mother. If you ask me why, I might say that's because that's what you wanted. you wanted to be a better mother to your daughter, to your daughter in law. You took up with the Captain's little one, and with the little minotaur, because the kids adore you, and you are good with them. Not because we forced you to. Yes, you fought me on me asking you to take over Daycare One, but now you see it again as a demotion, a watering down of the fires that burn in your fierce grey heart."

"I don't need a cold-blooded Intel operative, Mrs. Dox. I could have dozens of them- implacable, cold, able to strike without mercy and carry no regret. Such personnel are available in Starfleet, particularly in Starfleet Intelligence. But that's not what the Hera needs. It's not what Dox or Mona need, not what those kids on the R&D flight deck need. The person that you are- the one who smiles and plays peek-a-boo, but can still decode a 98 character Romulan cipher by recognizing it as a variant of a L'iger codex used fifty years ago two sectors away and reprogram the intercepted message to send false data... that's the woman I need. One who balances efficiency and compassion. You, Mrs. Dox."

"If you believe you have been unduly influenced, I believe we can offer you a modified force field belt to insure the radiation Hera emanates does not affect you, and it should fade from your cells in time. Or we can discuss leaching it out of you to ensure that your mind and your choices are your own. Hera will not take offense- her 'gifts' are for those who wish them, and not for those who do not. If need be I can transfer you to remove you from the source, and over time you can make your determinations on your own, and make your choices knowing you are making them free of any influence." Sighing, Rita wound it up.

"I will say you are a better woman than the one I shamed, who lied to her daughter in an effort to keep an old lie solvent, untrusting of her daughter's ability to handle the truth, and of her own ability to face it. You are far stronger, far braver than that woman I had to learn a word out of the Romulan dictionary to insult. You have become so much more than you were, and for what it's worth, I'm proud of you. But I understand suspecting manipulation and mind games and how integral they have been to your life, and I respect how unsettling this is for you. So, how would you like to proceed, Mrs. Dox?"

There was another long pause as Jaeih absorbed every word and processed all the information. "I... wished to keep my concerns from Mnhei'sahe and Mona. I did not want to disrupt this day for them, so I suppose I still have a ways to go towards learning to trust, in that regard." She said with a slightly lighter tone and a light chuckle and a sigh.

"I am... trying to be better," she said, not directly answering Rita, but rather letting her mind wander and her thoughts simply come out. It was not natural to her, and took a bit of doing to get there in the moment, but once she was, she did nothing to stop herself. "I... love them, Rita. I love those children. I... fight against the voice of the woman I was, who wishes to degenerate the place I now find myself in in my life. And on many days, that voice is weak. On some days, it is completely quiet. Today... it grew strong again, bolstered by what I have learned."

"And, in truth, what I had reason to suspect for a while now, but chose to ignore."

"I would... not become that woman again. I would drown her in her own rage and anguish if I could, to leave her forever behind me," Jaeih declared, strength returning to her voice. "But that is not how life works. We must learn to accept and live with the worst parts of ourselves. And... that is easier in my life now. And I would keep it that way if I could."

"I would proceed... by continuing upon the course I have chosen. If this... aura has made it easier for me to be the woman that my daughter, Mona, the children and you need me to be, then I would wish to continue to do what I have done in accepting it, as it is the woman I have long lacked the strength to become." Jaeih said, more confidently. "I apologize for my need this evening, if it has disturbed you. Though... I am thankful for your assistance. I must still apologize for my distrust to the others if I am to move forward properly, but..."

"Thank you, Rita." Jaeih said sincerely.

"I have two points to raise, Mrs. Dox, if you will indulge me?" Paris replied, then nodded at the silence which indicated assent. "One, I don't mind having to prove myself, and Starfleet's intentions to you, Mrs. Dox. It stops me becoming complacent, and keeps me mindful of my own words and actions, because if I ever doubt that I will be held accountable, I know you are there, and you are watching, and you are waiting for me and my promise of Starfleet to falter and betray your trust. That isn't a bad thing, and in my own way I appreciate it. Your trust is hard-won, and not to be taken for granted. I appreciate that."

"Second, I have always referred to you as Mrs. Dox. I suppose this may be interpreted as me continually reinforcing that identity- that of mother, older woman, matriarch. In a way, I suppose that is true," Rita admitted. "But to be honest, it's how I was raised. Despite the fact that my date of birth precedes your own, you are older, and have more life experience than I. While your daughter is a peer to me, you are her mother. I was raised to respect my elders, and part of doing so is to refer to them not with the familiar first name, but the honorific and the last name."

"That's why you are Mrs. Dox to me. Not because it diminishes you in any way. But because it offers you respect when I address you in that way, much like I seldom call the Captain by her first name. I am well aware of it, but... using her title is a small token of my respect." At that, Rita chuckled. "Besides, it is a long-standing Earth tradition that great lady spies are often referred to as 'Mrs.' and their last names, because in Earth society it often caused others to underestimate such a personage, imagining them to be incapable of being a capable operative."

"Interesting." Jaeih said, and Rita could hear that there was the lightest of smiles upon her face as she spoke. "I would learn more of this Earth tradition when we return. That said, I hope my use of your forename earlier was not seen as a sign of disrespect."

Her tone a bit more serious now, Jaeih elaborated. "In the moment, I decided that if I was to express my respect to you properly, not simply as a Commander, but as an individual that I trust, that such use would hopefully communicate that idea. The value of an individual's true name is something of an oft-unspoken aspect of Romulan culture, and its use generally reserved only for those that have earned it. As such, I hope I did not act presumptuously, and if I have, I would apologize."

"Mrs. Dox... Jaeih," Rita replied gently. "You wanted to really stress the moment, and from you, that IS an honorific. It's fine, relax. Look... you are worried because you have the sudden realization that your life and choices may not have been your own, that you are being manipulated. You are a Romulan. I daresay you are the most Romulan Romulan who has ever Romulaned. You can lie effortlessly and with passion. You actually strive to cleave to a code of honor, yet it has often gotten tangled up in your fears and you have failed. But here, in this place, on this ship, with your daughter and her family, you found purpose."

"YET you want more. You want to be able to affect the universe on a larger scale. You are frustrated, despite the freedom you have and the activities in which you are engaged. I asked you to guide the minds of the next generation of exceptional explorers, and I can tell you STILL see it as nanny duty, when you should be... what? Captaining the ship? Doing my job? Your unbridled ambition is part of what makes you truly Romulan, Mrs. Dox. You lack absolutely none of it, I can assure you." Rita chuckled, shook her head, then wiped herself and got up, stepping over to the sonic shower.

It was a truth that stung to hear, but in her heart, Jaeih acknowledged that she had called Rita Paris for a reason: to hear what she didn't want to hear from a woman who would not lie to her.

"If Hera has actually affected you, it is only to turn all of that toward defending your family, and your tattered but rebuilding honor. Not unlike the namesake thereof," the extradimensional explorer observed. "I'm proud of Mnhei'sahe across all metrics. She's not the angry young woman with the empty quarters, save for the punching dummy smeared in green blood. Who hurts herself when she makes a mistake. She has come a VERY long way, and your have had no small part in that. Healing her relationship with you, being able to rely upon and confide in you... to trust you... has given her a foundation to stop hating herself and trust herself, her instincts and her choices. Because she isn't busy beating herself up over her past... with you."

"So if Hera has affected you, that's the result. Take all of that for what you will, Mrs. Dox. Lecture over. Thoughts?" the old-fashioned officer stepped out of the shower, reaching for some lotion to moisturize her skin.

On her end, Jaeih tilted her head slightly at the somewhat telling sound in the background of Rita's sonic shower and replied. "My thoughts. My thoughts are... complicated, as usual. Yes, you are correct. My ambitions and my fears remain a problem. They have always interrupted my desires to be... better. For myself and for Mnhei'sahe. My ambitions robbed her of a father. Robbed her of a proper home. I... would control those fears and temper those ambitions. If this Hera has helped me do that, then I accept that as a boon."

There was a slight warble in her voice. "And I would return to the purpose I have found on the ship that bares her name."

"Mrs. Dox, your ambition is of little consequence because you hold no rank. So you have as much authority as we grant you. With which you will grumble but content yourself, and eventually see why you were chosen for the task. Jaeih... it's okay to be freaked out at the birth of your grandchildren, an event VERY much beyond your ability to control. So a discovery like Hera at a time like that is perfectly natural for it to be perhaps more stressful than one would have hoped approaching such an occasion."

"Don't be so hard on yourself. If you need to call the Commander, or if you need to call Rita, I'm right here, alright?" The emotional executive hoped that her tone sold the sentiment, which was genuine, of course. "I promise you, I genuinely believe Hera means no harm. I sent her along too, because if only as a midwife, she had been doing this for literally nine thousand years. No one knows more about childbirth than her, so... if you have mother in law jitters or grandma jitters, maybe try talking to Hera. She genuinely understands the experience, be it Human or Romulan."

"After all, the Olympians took a tour of Romulus after they'd been rebranded by Rome..."

"Hmmm. An interesting point, indeed" Jaieh said, running a finger across her lips as she considered Rita's words. "Perhaps that is... overdue. I will speak with her. Apologize for my earlier behavior. She seemed... quite insistent that she would allow no harm to come to the children, and I disregarded that."

"I have one more question, if I may." Jaieh asked, taking the moment of silence over the comm as approval to continue. "Hera said that you had become her daughter. You share this depth of feeling with her?"

That earned a pause, during which Rita rolled her eyes to the overhead, then inhaled deeply and let it out slowly, not in a sigh, but in a centering of sorts. When she spoke, her voice was quiet and low- clearly this was personal to her.

"When I was six, my mother died. I have enough memories of her to know she was there, and that she loved us, and that she was kind of amazing. I remember I was a year and a half old and I had found a corroded battery that was tasty to lick, and I remember offering her some. She scrubbed my tongue off with a washcloth- a very odd sensation that stick with you- and she warned me that was poison, not to eat that because it would hurt me."

"I have a few memories like that of my mother, and aside from a few images, that's all. There is some suspicion that my father killed her... I'll never know for certain, but signs did point that way." There was another pause on the line, then the star-crossed Starfleet siren pressed on. "I grew up with my father and my brother, who ignored or derided me and favored my brother, showering him with praise for any accomplishment, real or imagined. I would go to to her friends houses and see their relationships with their mothers, and I was envious. But I knew what I wanted, so I played the game and hung out with the boy's club to learn how they spoke to one another, what they expected from me and how to turn it all to the advantage of my career."

"I'm no stranger to ambition myself, Mrs. Dox," Rita admitted, even as she inadvertently pointed out that she was, in some ways, envious of Dox's relationship with her own mother, to whom the golden age officer was making said admission. "So I worked and I pushed and in all of that, there was never that role model behind me who said that she was proud of me. There was never the woman I could go to, who would never judge me, but always be on my side. She'd hear me out, maybe offer some insight, maybe some wisdom or advice, then give me a hug and a cookie and send me back out there to wrestle with the forces of the galaxy."

"Hera... is literally the goddess of women and motherhood, amongst the rest. Home, hearth and family. I... come from a Starfleet legacy, Mrs. Dox. I don't know if you are aware of that. There were Paris men building the NX-01 to get us out there into space, under Jonathan Archer. My own mother worked the shipyards of Utopia Planitia- that was where she met my father, and they fell in love. There have been Paris' in Starfleet since before it WAS Starfleet- that's what they say in my family." At this, Paris sniffled, because the subject was an emotional one for her, and she was surprised to discover that tears were welling up.

"I have Sonak... so I am not alone. I have a family, through him, and we plan to have children together. I have a plan- hah!" Rita barked a laugh, pulling on a pair of lacy blue panties as she hunted through the drawer for the matching teddy. "When does Rita not have a plan? But we'll have a family, and we'll carry on the tradition. That's important to me... more than I would care to admit. Through all of that, it would be... nice... if there was..."

At that, Rita did sigh, as her shoulders sagged. "I believe in Hera. I know it isn't strictly Starfleet and it clouds my judgment, but... she turned her life around, and she does her best to not interfere, but to be there for us when we need her. If I go to her for some advice, she gives me a hug and a cookie and sends me off with a good idea. She... occupies that place in my life, where... I will admit, Mrs. Dox, I always wished there would be someone there. She... calls me her daughter. Which is problematic, I know. But in a sense, we are all her daughters. She IS the goddess of women, after all. Which is a dodge, I know, but..."

"It is an odd patchwork family that a crew tends to form. It has been thus since the days of tall-masted ships on the seas of Earth, and it remains so out here amongst the stars," Rita waxed eloquent for a bit. "I don't exactly call Hera 'mother', but I do not dispute her claim to me as her daughter. She once offered me a boon, and I took it. I asked her to be the kind of goddess that I could tell my kids about someday. not the snarling, rage-filled petty tyrant she had been, but a goddess whose name was stamped on the hull of this starship in letters twenty-one meters high."

"That she has become, for which I am very proud of her. She genuinely just wants to help- she's not forcing her assistance on anyone, her power nor her wisdom on anyone. Instead she is just there for us if we ask of her, and she does her best for us. Which... is kind of what we all want out of a mother, isn't it?" At that, Paris mopped away the tears, which made an odd juxtaposition to the lingerie she had chosen as she hunted for a scent- nothing too strong, as his olfactory senses were quite keen, but something the Master of Gol would find pleasing. Really, she had run out of things to say, and while she had meandered, she wasn't even certain she had gotten a point across.

But many star systems away, on the homeworld of her unlikely daughter-in-law, the impact of what Rita Paris had revealed hit the elder Romulan woman right in her heart. Through Rita, she now had a sense of understanding of the being known as Hera, that she had previously chosen to overlook. "I... apologize that my questions have given you cause to think of things that you would have otherwise chosen not to. But I thank you for your answer. I greatly appreciate that you have done so with such openness and it has helped me... considerably."

"When my daughter declared you her Rinam... her sister... my feelings then were decidedly mixed. They are no longer mixed. But beyond that, what it told me was that you had her ultimate trust. That single word told me the core of all I would need to know of you as an individual, even if... again, at the time... I did not like it. Since then, I have overcome those early feelings and have come to trust you greatly as well. With her life and mine, when needed. As such, your word on the subject of Hera is... extremely valuable to me. I thank you for listening to me."

"It's quite alright, Mrs. Dox. I don't mind... and truly, it WAS a fair question. One I haven't really defined myself, so thank you for calling me out on it, and keeping me honest. As for calling me..." Internally, Rita received the message, a subtle nudge, that Sonak's experiment could now conclude without his attendance, and that he was on his way to their quarters. "Mrs. Dox, I offered you the same challenge that I offered Hera. To be better, simply put, in all aspects of your life. To be a better person, a better mother, a better you. Both of you have risen, and continue to rise, to that challenge quite brilliantly. I am very proud to know both you and Hera."

"With that said, it's my responsibility to be there to help you when you need it. I can't just ask you to turn over a new leaf and then just abandon you to do it all yourself? Not exactly responsible, that," Rita chuckled as she smoothed out the sheets of the bed and pitched her rabbit into the nightstand. "So I am glad that you called me when you needed some insight, some input so that you could establish your own mind and reassure yourself. I need to be there for you when you need me- that's part of it all too, right?"

Listening, Jaeih nodded reflexively, even though she couldn't be seen. "As Mnhei'sahe would say, we are stronger together. YOUR words, I believe. And good ones. Words worth remembering in time of need. I still need to apologize to Hera for my poor behavior earlier, but for now, I will take my leave."

Sparing an unguarded smirk in her hotel suite, the very observant Romulan with very sharp ears had heard and interpreted the trip to the refresher, the sonic shower, the opening and closing of drawers and the smoothing of the sheets and she considered the potential implications of what that could all mean as she continued. "I would not wish to interrupt your evening any further than I already have. Jolan'tru, Commander, and thank you again."

A musical laugh was the reply, as the doors to the quarters opened in the background. "Perfect timing as always. Go see to the birth of your grandchildren, and try not to be too cross with Jablonski when she is only following orders. Good night, Mrs. Dox." Rita looked to the overhead and added, in a whisper as she crossed the room to greet her husband, "Computer, please end transmission..."

Back on Miradon, the communication relay deactivated with a melodic chirping sound and Jeaih stepped back across the room to the outcropping of a balcony that overlooked the city of Quen'Quen. The night sky almost had a purple quality to it thanks to the glow that came off of the brightest of the two moons in the sky, which in that moment became just a little brighter as the smaller, dark moon that Mona called Nicoo'la for her people's trickster god, cleared its orbital eclipse that had been blocking the light of the main mood, called Minay. 

"So..." Jaeih said with a grin, as she spoke to the moon over the balcony's edge. "The shadow has passed, in more ways than one. Poetic."