Counseling in the Rain

Posted on Wed Apr 6th, 2016 @ 3:45am by Tallara Lifal-Lesteh & Lieutenant Taro Ishakawa

Mission: Talosian Perversions
Location: Counselor's office

Tallara glanced at the time once again. It seemed that Lieutenant Ishakawa was late for his command mandated counselling session. She hated tracking people down and if he didn't show, it was his own career on the line. However, that was a lot of paperwork and it might just be easier finding this guy. Not that she could help him if he didn't want it...

Tapping her comm badge, she spoke. "Tallara to Lieutenant Ishakawa, You're late for your appointment. Would you rather be here in the next few minutes, or should I send no-show papers to the Captain?"

=^= I was checking the Main Dish and thought leaving it half open would not be a wise decision. I am on my way. =^= Ishakawa did not lie, that would be losing of face and he could not have that.

Truth be told he had avoided the Counselor as he had bad memories of them; the judgemental ones that just held his career out over a cliff like a hostage. He could not be helped; he would be better off out of the service. What did they know; the Hagakure had much to say on the men of such intellect and learning.

After waiting a couple minutes, the missing person finally came through Tallara's open door. With a key press at her desk, she closed it and looked to him meaningfully.

"I am Sorry Counselor, I did not think the job would take so long, I humbly ask forgiveness as your time is not to be wasted." He had bow as was proper for standing a lady up in the first place, it was true he did not like Counselors but an appointment is an appointment. "I have put this off as long as is possible, I will give no more resistance." He offered as he looked up at the counselor. "You have my attention Counselor."

Tallara still had that meaningful look on her face as he spoke. "I can't help you unless you want help and after what happened at the banquet, I'm surprised command hasn't ordered me to help you." Standing and moving to one of the chairs in the room, she motioned to the couch across from it. "Please, at least try to get comfortable."

"Yes Counselor." Ishakawa took a breath before he moved over towards the couch and took a pillow placing it upon the ground before kneeling upon it Japanese style with his hands upon his thighs as he kept his back straight but not ram-rod so. "This is comfortable ." He said with an honest tone. "This is how I spoke with My Master of Bushido. I give you the same honor in our passing of wisdom."

It was how he set up his quarters, the tatami mats and other furnishings that brought a little of 'Home' to his new quarters. The couch was where the past Counselors had tried to rebuild him in their image of what he should be, that his belief in Bushido and practice of a Samurai were outdated. This is who he was and he would give the counselor the respect of her position and build from there.

"WHat do you wish to know?" He asked simply.

Tallara took a deep breath and decided to get started then. "Well, first of all, I'd like to know a little about you in your own words and what you'd like help with and how you'd like me to help you. I've read your file and I'm honestly surprised you're still in Starfleet, but that choice is yours, not a counselor's."

"I was told I must attend these sessions." He said. "I want to be able to do my duty for this command; why must everyone want to cast me out like a Ronin?" He asked. "I ask what it takes to be able to just serve this ship, tell me and i will do it?"

Tallara had to facepalm hard. "I just told you how to start this. No one is kicking you out. If you don't want my help, then that's your decision and you're wasting both our time being here."

"I have a friend on the ship who can understand some of it." He said. "I was made into a Ronin by the Orion Syndicate Pirates before I was reinducted into my duty station." He told her. "It is not easy to admit a weakness, especially to one I am sworn to protect." He told her. "I relive my failures when I close my eyes or if I see others falling into a similar situation."

"So, your master was killed by the Orions and now you're a disgraced samurai?" Tallara was guessing this was what he meant, though without specifics she was a bit lost. "As for reliving the events, that will sadly never go away fully, but you at least have the chance to do good in your life still. To try and make sure that never happens to anyone else."

When the Captain accepted my transfer I became a Samurai again; I have chance to serve a master again." He explained. "They broke me in the ships, that is why I became a Ronin. I did things that disgraced my name. I helped kill innocents and ..." He lowered his eyes. "And fellow Fleet personnel." He admit. "I did things that made it easier to kill those I should have protected."

"And that will be a difficult burden to bear. I can't tell you how to cope with that, but I can support you in discovering how to. Over time, with the right techniques, I believe you'll be able to find peace." Tallara replied.

"I was weak..." He admit. "A samurai should be strong.. able to bear the weight. "Honor can be heavy as a mountain or light as a feather' the Hagakure says. "I could not bear the mountain. I could not save one soul." He said almost under his breath. "The One Soul that counted the most..."

"And that is a difficult thing to bear. There's one thing you have to realize though. Something I'm sure your teachings would agree with. You can not change the actions of other people when you're no longer in a position of power." Tallara spoke calmly and with a reverence that belied her years. "In other words, you can't be held responsible for what happened during your imprisonment."

"A Ronin is one who has no master." Ishakawa said. "She died trusting I would save her to the end. Thirty seconds, it was thirty seconds late repairing a fusion generator that powered weapons used to fire upon Federations ships and merchant vessels." He looked up at her. "When liberated I was nearly put in irons as I destroyed that generator after the battle and before were were taken to safety." He explained. "I told the guards and the ship counselor the story of how they shot a woman and let her bleed in front of me, I had to repair and she would live but the damage took longer and it was too late to save her; she and I were Lovers, I failed her."

"Still out of your control. Fate is like that." Tallara spoke softly. "I think if you meditate on your actions and the actions of others, I think you'll see that."

"It is still hard to accept failure; I have told self that I should have been able to do the task and running scenarios in my head I should have been able to complete the task in the time given." He told her. "I have vow not to let pressure of situation get to me and since I have no similar tie nor do I think I will have it is a moot point in future."

"I'm still going to recommend meditation." Tallara insisted. "Just as a starting point."

"Are you to enforce the meditation regiment or do I seek out other sources?" Ishakawa asked in what he thought a sound question. "I understand life is a process or relearning one's self and meditation is a componant of that." He made eye contact. "Will I make a record or come on regular basis to report what enlightenments I have discovered?"

"Nothing is mandatory at this point and we'll only talk about what you're comfortable with." Tallara replied. "The computer can provide you with a holographic guide or a list of people on the ship that are masters of meditation, whichever you decide upon."

I do not suppose a Bushido Master will be what you wish?" Ishakawa asked. "Would talking with someone who has had similar situation be acceptable as well?" He wondered. "I know of someone that I am more comfortable talking with that might help?"

"If you prefer anyone else, that's fine. I'm here to support you. I just want to see you improve." Tallara insisted.

"No insult intended, you have been kind." He ow slightly. "I meant as another avenue to get things out of my head." He looked at the young woman. "You have not tried to force me to take steps but offer help; I am more comfortable with you as counselor than the past who try to drum me out of service. I only wish to serve this ship with Honor, it is all I have."

"Thank you," Tallara said, bowing back. "Is there anything else you want to talk about today?

"Yes, women." Ishakawa said firmly.

"Ok..." Tallara shifted in her seat slightly and began to wonder which direction this would go in next. "What about women do you want to speak about?"

"I have been scolded for my treatment of women; they do not want to have a man do things for them." He said. "In the camps I did what is proper and looked out for the women; protected them and tried to assure they had what they require to be women. Now they want to do all by them selves; some compete with men and many do not act like ladies in lieu of their wanting to compete and even surpass men?" He shook his head. "Am I wrong for wanting to be a proper man and look out for women?"

Tallara paused for a moment, thinking on this. "Being gentlemanly is a nice thing... but I think it's seen more as courtship these days. The equal rights movements of the early twenty first century on Earth being a classic example of this."

"I suppose while under the Orions I became too protective, it is hard to break an old habit I suppose." He tried to hide the sag in his shoulders. "How is a man to show favor to an attarctive woman if she is competing with me?" Ishakawa looked to the counselor. "I sort of miss the more defining of roles, I was once told by my Grandfather that in my life the Minute I understand women ; that is the right amount of time I will have to truly understand women."

"Women don't want to be protected or understood. They want to be respected as a unique sentient being that may or may not have differences from any other being. Just like men, they want to be productive and to find their own place in society. How attractive they are should have no bearing on that unless you want to mate with them. Do you want to mate with every female you find attractive?" Tallara wasn't sure if that answered Taro, but that's how she saw many societies.

"No, I am very selective about whom I pillow." Ishakawa replied. "I have not found anyone of interest on the ship; I tend to take care of carnal needs while on shoreleave to appease any complecations with the crew." He mentioned. "I will have to work on changing my nature when it comes to that."

"Sorry. That's just how society has worked itself out over the years." Tallara commented with a weak smile.

"If I can survive Orion Slavery I can adapt to Polite Society and Star Fleet." Ishakawa told the counselor. "You do not have to worry about me being rude to a lady, it would be unworthy one who Follows Bushido." He managed to smile for her. "I do thank you for your giving me your time?" He bow as was polite.

Tallara bowed back, smiling politely. "It's always a pleasure and I'm always here if you need me."

"I shall see you next week." He told her as he departed saving some face as he still had his dignity.

OFF




Lt Taro Ishakawa
Chief OPS