Filling in the Blanks

Posted on Tue Feb 12th, 2019 @ 11:14pm by Lieutenant Commander Mnhei'sahe Dox & Captain Enalia Telvan

Mission: Earthly Visitation
Timeline: 2396

"Never speak in anger...”

On the Runabout, Selune, this was the advice that Rita Paris had given Mnhei'sahe Dox concerning the young pilot's burgeoning relationship with Ensign Mona Gonadie. Paris said, “I have seen more damage done from a slip of the tongue and words spoken in anger than anything else in a relationship."

Paris wasn't speaking about Dox's friendship with the Hera's Captain, Enalia Telvan. But Dox had chosen to take the spirit of the words to her newfound concerns over her recent appointment as the latest Baroness of the Captain's Artan Pirate family. They were concerns that needed addressing, but Dox was committed to not allowing her initial feelings over that concern taint this new relationship. But she still needed to talk to the Captain about it.

To that end, she had put in a written request first thing in the morning to meet with the Captain to discuss 'questions and concerns regarding my appointment as Baroness Fifth Class'. Dox was nervous and had begun second-guessing the wording of the request as perhaps to official or formal sounding, but second guessing herself was something Dox excelled at. The anxious aviatrix wanted answers but she also wanted to preserve the growing friendship that she believed in with her Captain.

The relationships that were forming in her short few months on the Hera were important to her and she was committed to not allowing her own self-doubt poison that.

Sitting at the small table in her quarters, Dox had just finished off a bowl of warm oatmeal for breakfast and was looking over a PaDD with her work for the day on it when she received her response in the form of her door chime going off.

When she received the message, Enalia had decided to address this sooner than later and stopping in at Dox's quarters before work for a more personal talk was either a good idea or a bad idea. She'd soon find out which it was as she straightened her uniform and pressed the door chime.

Momentarily startled, Dox stood up and walked over to the door. For a brief second she wondered if it might be Mona as she opened the door. "Captain?" She replied, somewhat surprised. She didn't expect a personal visit, however, and her stomach did a flip flop.

But she had made the request to speak and so needed to boost her resolve and do so. Still, the young lieutenant was understandably nervous. "Uh... would you like to come in?"

"Thank you." Enalia stepped into the somewhat spartan quarters and glanced around with a polite smile as the doors closed. "You asked to see me? It sounded like it was a somewhat private inquiry so I figured somewhere you're comfortable would be best."

"Uh... thank you, Captain." Dox was nervously trying to work up her courage but didn't want to forget basic politeness. "Can I get you anything?"

"Well, a place to sit would be nice," Enalia teased, flashing her lopsided grin at Dox. "Relax, I'm not going to bite or anything. I only do that with my wife."

Smiling lightly, Dox walked over to the small couch and chair that come with the room and gestured to the chair while taking a seat on the couch opposite.

The spotted woman sat down in the chair like she did her chair on the bridge without thinking - knees together, hands on the hand rests, back upright, and looking like she owned it. "So... What's on your mind? You mentioned your appointment as Baroness."

Sitting across, Dox's posture was slightly slumped and her hands were crossed in her lap. She paused for a second before taking a breath. "I was... Last night I was talking with Baroness von Alcott. Mostly just catching up on everything, really. But eventually the topic worked itself around to my Mother."

Sitting up a little straighter, Dox continued. "And she mentioned... the Baroness Sienae Nei'rrh of the Romulan Refugee Corps. That she was undecided regarding what side she might fall on during the tribunal. She also mentioned that... her and most.of her crew is comprised of refugees that my Mother and I got out of Romulus. I... I didn't know any of that."

Her tone shifted slightly to a more serious tone, with a slight pleading to it. "You... told me that my name was a factor in you choosing me for this assignment on the Hera. That you owed my mother a debt. But that I also earned my place as well. And... I guess I need to hear that again. Because... I can't stop being afraid now that I'm not here because of my abilities or who I am... as an officer. But because of who my Mother is. I'm sorry... I understand that this is my own insecurities bleeding out."

"Ah, yeah... That makes sense..." Pulling out a small PaDD, Enalia pulled up the list of names she had had to pick from for her new CFCO, which took a few. "Out of these fifteen names I was given, no record really stood out among them so I'll be honest. I chose you out of that fifteen because of your name and our prior ties." She then offered the PaDD to Dox to peruse.

"As for you yourself, that first mission you proved yourself and I knew I could trust you. I doubt even half of those names could have taken nearly so well to my tactics or come up with their own like you have. That's why, when I needed backup for my trip to the auction because Schwein was still injured, I turned to you. I had that ID made a few days prior just in case and I fully expected you to hand it back afterwards."

"But you didn't." Enalia breathed in deeply through her nose, preparing for what she was about to say. "I know you ran away from that sort of life. Hells, I did too for the most part. But there are a lot of good people out there that you and your mother helped that are a part of the Artan family now and if I didn't at least offer you some sort of... Closure with... I don't think I would be doing my best as a Starfleet Captain or as Princess of the Artan Pirates."

Relaxing a little, Dox sat back on the couch a little. "Thank you, Captain. I won't lie... I... I enjoyed that trip to the auction. It really was a reminder that not every aspect of my life back then was horrible." She chuckled lightly.

"It felt good to be... asked in for a change. So, when you didn't ask for the ID, I clung to it. I was proud of it... I still am. I just... I needed to ask. I needed to know, if that makes any sense. So, thank you."

"You're very welcome." The Trill Captain smiled warmly and genuinely. "As for the tribunal... I had no idea it would happen. My mother is a horrible, controlling, evil person... Nothing I ever did was good enough. My father wasn't either. My sister always excelled though. Pretty sure she had her augmented with Schwein's DNA. When I gave you those orders in sickbay, afterwards I was afraid I had finally snapped and was starting to act like her."

Hanging her head, Dox remembered her last conversation with her own Mother and how badly it had gone. "I... can understand that. So desperately not wanting to become her and finding yourself doing it anyway. I'm sorry. And... I'm sorry that I didn't even think to question those orders. I was so angry... so blind that I knew what it meant and did it anyway."

Looking up at the Captain, Dox continued. "Hera telling me that we were being... Influenced. It doesn't change the feeling that I had to want in on some level to be influenced to begin with. It doesn't take away that fear for me. Of becoming that again."

"I think that's where our Angel in Gold comes in. I have a feeling she has more sway over them than they have over her. I know it's a lot to put on her, but..." the spotted woman paused dramatically as she stared into Dox's eyes with all seriousness. "I've come to rely on her for stability. To keep my way when I start to waver off the Starfleet path."

Smiling back sincerely, Dox replied. "Yeah... I absolutely understand that. I... kind of do, too. It's good to have a compass." It was a strange conversation to be having with her Captain, but it was clear that both women had learned to rely on Rita Paris to slap them upside the proverbial heads when they wandered off course.

"She's a damn good navigator," Enalia confirmed with a smile. "So was there anything else you wanted to ask about? Anything about the tribunal? Swordplay? How I've balanced it with Starfleet before meeting Rita?... Relationship advice?"

"I really don't know much of anything about the tribunal and I talked to Schwein about scheduling some time to learn how to handle a sword and..." Dox was answering the questions before she had fully processed the last one. "Relationship advice?"

Groaning comically, Dox continued with an awkward laugh. "Is there anyone on board that doesn't know I went on a date at this point?"

"Well, I've heard that the EMH is the last to hear about ship gossip. If you get a talk from him about contraceptives and safe sex..." Enalia was obviously teasing now, but there was some truth to her words.

"I'm ready for the tribunal, now." Dox buried her face in her hands as she moaned. "Skip the lessons and just stab me now."

The spotted captain chuckled softly and leaned in to pat her half Romulan counterpart on the shoulder. "I think it would be best that you get some lessons in first. And that you enjoy your love life while you can. After all, finding someone that looks at you and doesn't see your wounds as disasters, but cracks to pour their love into... It can be an amazing thing. From what I've heard, you might have found that. Now if you could get her to open up about her own past... That has yet to be seen."

Raising her head back up, Dox replied with an awkward grin. "I'll settle for a second date and go from there. But thanks. For everything."

"Glad I could help." Standing, Enalia tugged down on her uniform top and straightened it out before heading to the door. "Now if you'll excuse me, I have bridge duty this morning. I don't want to be late or Commander Paris might reprimand me."

Smiling, Dox got up and adjusted her uniform and picked up her PaDD with a light smile. "Absolutely. Duty calls."