I'll Be There For You

Posted on Tue Mar 22nd, 2016 @ 1:04am by Lieutenant Daln Hadren & Staff Warrant Officer Nexi

Mission: Talosian Perversions
Location: Wandering Star / Hadren Quarters

Nexi was just leaving the infirmary, a brace around her hand; the doctor wanted to get Nexi into surgery for her hand, but Nexi wasn't having it, so the bones were set and mended the best it could be without the necessary surgery and a brace put on to keep the hand immobile while it finished healing. Nexi looked down at her bound hand with a sigh, then trudged along towards her quarters, only they weren't her quarters anymore, she had moved in with Daln a short time ago. Sigh again, she changed directions and headed for the cargo bay with it's hidden docking bay where her old friend the Wandering Star was berthed. As she passed through the makeshift kitchen in her ship, she grabbed a bottle of booze, not really caring which of the numerous bottles she had grabbed. Then she flopped onto her couch, taking a heavy draw off the bottle and willing this emptiness inside her to go away...

Daln was just starting to wonder where Nexi was when he got off duty. He exited the bridge, then tapped his commbadge. =A= Hadren to Nexi. =A= When she didn't answer, he asked the computer, =A= Computer locate Nexi. =A=

=A= Nexi is in the Wandering Star. =A=

Daln nodded and headed in the direction of the cargo bay where the Star was. Upon entering the bay, he approached the shuttle and knocked on the side of the open hatch. "May I come in?" he asked.

"Whatever..." came her raspy grunt of a reply, not moving from the couch where she was sprawled out, her splinted hand over her eyes to block out the light and to hide the fact that she had been crying, the other hand holding the liquor bottle with a vice-like grip.

Daln felt how she was feeling and came in slowly, finally sitting down next to her. "Mind if I have some?" he said, gesturing at the bottle.

Nexi raised the bottle slightly, releasing it reluctantly as he took it away from her.

Daln sighed. "Nexi. Nexi, look at me." He waited until she met his dark eyes.

Nexi didn't want to look at him, for the most part she really just wanted to be alone and drunk, but she did as she asked and pulled her hand away from her eyes, not before hastily wiping the tears away. "What?" she asked in a gruff tone.

He could feel the turmoil inside her, and in turn it was causing him some unease, which he was sure she could feel. "What happened? It's not just Hawke and Wang, though I know that's part of it. What happened to you?" He took a drink and handed the bottle back.

"I can't..." she started, then the tears started burning in her eyes again. She couldn't escape her past, she could never escape what she used to be... It felt like she couldn't breath, but she didn't realize it was just the pit of emptiness she was trying to escape.

Daln reached behind her shoulders and drew her close, letting the salt of her tears soak his uniform. He didn't know if she would pull away, but he knew, just by feeling it with her, that she needed it. Whether she would allow it was a different story.

Nexi made a feeble attempt to resist the closeness, but she needed the hug so badly that she eventually surrendered to it, letting out all the pain and frustrations she had been holding in for years.

Daln wrapped both arms around her, just holding her for a while, letting her cry her pain out onto his chest. He alternately stroked her back, her hair, or just sat there with his arms around her, his cheek resting on her head. He tried to calm himself, picturing a beach with waves breaking upon it. Just the wind, the sun, and the waves. They changed, but it was always the same. Calming. Comforting.

Nexi didn't know how long she cried, but eventually her sobbing subsided, ending embarrassingly in the occasional hiccup. She reached up to to wipe her nose, resulting in a substantial amount of snot on her hand. Without a second though, she wiped her hand off on the back of Daln's jacket.

He smiled down at her. "Feeling better, babe?" he asked. He reached over and wiped away her tears with his thumb. "I've never seen you so upset. Are you sure you're okay?"

"No, I'm not feeling better," Nexi said angrily; now her face was all puffy and her head hurt, crying sucked, why do people even do it?! "I- I just... I can't escape my past, Daln! It's like.. I try to be good, I'm trying to... do good... but it's always there, I can't get away from him!"

Daln frowned and swept Nexi's hair out of her face. "Yes you can. If I have to, I will pay for your freedom. I can afford it. I never want you to hurt like that again. And if he does try to hurt you..." Daln's jaw tightened and his dark eyes narrowed, "I will destroy him." he said through clenched teeth.

"No, he's- I thought he was dead, he should be dead..." Nexi said shaking her head. Anyway, she'd already paid off her debt, and yet she was still haunted. "I heard him on the cube, why did I hear him?"

Daln shook his head. "I don't know. We're close to Talosian space. Maybe it was your mind playing tricks on you." He frowned. "But we should be far enough out that we're not affected." He cupped her face tenderly, looking into her eyes. "I don't know why you heard him, or how, but I do know that if anything wants to hurt you, or even thinks about hurting you...it will have to go through me first. I'll never let anything hurt you. You know that, right?"

Nexi didn't know how to answer, so she simply leaned into him and let a few more tears fall. "I don't know if I can do this..." she said in a quiet tone. "This enlisting thing, I don't know if I can do it... I don't know if I can watch people I care about getting hurt!" She was thinking about leaving again, just getting in the cockpit and getting as far away as she could! she had enough money, she could buy herself a nice little place somewhere... Nexi could take a beating if she had to, but she did not know if she was strong enough to watch the people she cared about getting hurt.

Daln pressed his lips to her forehead. He couldn't stand to see her in so much pain. "When I was a child, the Dominion attacked Betazed. I was just a child, not even a teenager yet. My telepathy was just starting, I had no control, and so I could feel the sheer terror of everyone else. And the Jem'Hadar...I'd never felt anything so murderous in my life. My father tried to help the Starfleet officers and was nearly killed. I thought he was going to die, and he would have if not for the Starfleet doctors. After the war, I was still scared, not wanting to leave the house, but my father told me that just because we lose the people we love, doesn't mean they aren't still with us. They're always with us, as long as they're in our hearts and minds." He looked into her eyes, and smiled. "And that's why I joined Starfleet: so I could help prevent anyone I loved from getting hurt again."

"I became a slave because my mother died with a debt to a Ferengi. Holding onto her didn't save me from the loneliness..." She went limp against Daln; she was so very tired all of a sudden! "And then I became a killer to buy my way to freedom; putting on a new jacket ain't gonna magically make all that right."

Daln shook his head. "No, it won't. But do you really want to forget your mother? Never remember her at all? Not the color of her hair, the way she smelled...nothing? Ever again?"

"I barely remember anything about her anyway..." she said tiredly. "I only ever remember the smell of felicium, the plant not the drug..." Though she remembered the drug too; her mother was a botanist trying to create a more potent drug.

Daln stroked her hair again. "And do you want to forget that? To never remember her? Ever again? Seems a lonely way to live."

"Tell me what I don't know..." Nexi answered sadly. "You think I don't wanna remember more? But remembering and holding on to her won't make anything right, and holding onto her didn't make me feel any less lonely when I was a kid. Your dad fed you some fucking mushy advice to make you feel better."

Daln started to get angry with her at the slur about his father. "Don't talk about my father that way again. Ever. And even if you don't remember her, does that mean you don't want me? I've spent I dont know how many hours trying to show you that I love you. And now you're just going to throw it away? Is that all I'm worth to you?"

"Fuck, don't you get it?!" Nexi said as she pushed him away, grabbing for her bottle of liquor. "It would kill me to see something bad happen to you! I don't know what the hell is wrong with me, I can't stop thinking about you and when I do, I worry all the time, you have no idea how frustrating and distracting that is! And after today... fuck, today... If you had been one of the ones lost, I..." She looked down at the bottle in her hand, raising it to her lips, but then she stopped, looked at the bottle again and set it on the table. "Fact is Daln, you mean more to me than anyone else on this damn ship. Well, except maybe Aewia... You two, if anything happened to either of you, I really do believe I'd go mad..." she finished, much softer than she had started.

Daln smiled. "And that, Nexi, is what is called love. Come on. I'll make you dinner. Get you cleaned up a bit. And then I'll try to cheer you up some more. He stood and took her hand, intending to help her to her feet.

"Is it?" Nexi replied with a grimace, going dead weight on him as he tried to pull her off the couch. "It kinda sucks," she said, but then grinned. "And I'm not sure if I feel like eating right now, I kinda have a headache, I think I just wanna sleep and try to forget about what happened on the cube."

He grinned and pulled her form into his arms. "Part of it. And the benefits are amazing." He carried her over to the cargo bay transporter and had the chief transport them to his quarters.

Setting her down on the couch, he tucked her hair away from her face and smiled at her. "you'll be alright, Nexi. You'll always have me"

"You can't promise that," she replied tiredly, trying to fight what she didn't understand. And the day was really catching up with her, her eyes were barely staying open.

"Yes, I can," he said "i'll always be here for you." He bent down and kissed her before sitting on the end of the couch with her head in his lap, just stroking her hair.

Nexi was too tired to argue, and soon she drifting off to sleep. Hopefully, tomorrow would be better...

Daln let her sleep, hoping she would have peaceful dreams. He sat there sroking her hair until he, too, fell asleep.

OFF:

Lt Daln Hadren
Chief Sec/Tac Officer
USS Hera

&

Nexi
Infiltration Specialist
USS Hera